remembering when it all changed, remembering when i was low and when i was above the clouds, remembering how it felt to be wrong and right and messed up and just fine and everything in between, everything, everything, everything.

and i'm trying to write it all down, trying to keep track of every detail, every fragment of a memory that slips through my mind is being written down.

right now i remember that car. i remember that cold, metal wall covered in bad teenage graffiti. i remember that garage, that hockey net that doubled as a table for five minutes in time. i remember that bed, that fucking bed. i remember that balcony, and the lights in the city, and the feeling of being trapped and free at the same time.

i didn't expect any of these moments but they changed me one way or another.

i'm going back to them. i'm documenting them. i'm finally doing something important to me.